RealTouch: a technological orifice that jacks into your computer and turns a subchannel of haptic commands into a servo-driven nightmarish despunking ordeal while watching your favouite porn star on VOD. There’s also a set of commands for homosex where the RealTouch simulates the most frighteningly muscular rectum you ever feared.
The funniest part? It was designed by a former NASA engineer.
Where is MY Mega-Man sex box?
My apartment smells like Chinese food. I must find the source, for I have not had any such food here in weeks.